What is true female power?
One year and a half ago the United States of America voted Donald Trump to be their 45th President. 52% of the American women voted for a man who openly discriminates and abuses women on a regular basis. A man who has been accused of sexual abuse numerous times. Unbelievable right? What if we turn it around? Could you imagine men would have voted for a woman who had openly called men ‘fat, ugly or dumb’? No, they would not have taken it.
This insightful story came for the mouth of my lovely ex-manager, who is by the way an amazing 62 year old man and friend, and who stated that women ‘really didn’t realise their power for change if they continue to vote for somebody who offends their entire gender’. Well, that’s what happened. 52% of women did vote for Donald Trump and he did become president.
A few months later we had a popular TV-personality here in Belgium (Bart De Pauw) who got accused by ‘celebrity women’ for sexual harassment. The whole #metoo movement. And I remember my male colleagues were outraged “For just a few dirty texts?!” “He just went to call at her house a few times” ‘If you can’t even make jokes”. Opinions were divided, but safe to say that the subject has triggered many discussions over the last months. But what is the debate really about?
I am what my ex-boyfriends like to call ‘a true feminist’, you know one of those girls that men really hate and fear, because they take everything ridiculously far. Now, I have to admit I might be a big believer in women’s rights, but I think women most of all shoot themselves in the foot. We might be the least supportive of our gender. How is that possible?
Let me explain. Part of us wants to support each other, fight the glass ceiling and be amazing friends and a true sisterhood, but another part of us wants to compete with each other. We are secretly jealous of our friend who is prettier, smarter, more self assured, has a better body and we go out of our way to prove she is just as human and mundane as we are/feel. Or we look at each others’ faults and point our friends bigger butt or bad taste in clothes. Now I think our feminist fight should start right here. Only if we change the image we have of our own gender, can we start to change how some of the men see us.
We have to step out of this competition we have started among ourselves. Only if we stop seeing ourselves as competition and accept the way we are, the way our friends are and how amazing the differences between us are, only then can we grow as a gender. They way I see it that’s true female power. Don’t invest time in fighting how some men see us, start working on how we see ourselves. Stop the competition between your friends, colleagues and that pretty girl or woman in the street. She is amazing, but so are you.
Have you ever seen men compare butts? Or comment on each other bad clothing? No!
I think it’s time we drop the competition as well lovies. Are you with me?
"Don't compare your life to others. There's no comparison between the sun and the moon. They shine when it's their time."